Tips for healthy confinement with children at home

Author: Sofía Beco Fonseca | Nurse | @sophiemamindu

After two years of the pandemic, concepts like bubble groups, disinfection, confinement, PCR testing, and masks are a reality in our children's daily lives. A reality that a few years ago we would have considered science fiction.

With constantly updated action protocols, many families face countless organizational and emotional challenges, requiring the entire family unit to constantly adapt.

In the event that one of our children is confined, the puzzle begins: fitting all the pieces together to provide support and care. In the vast majority of cases, parents have the following options: teleworking, taking a forced vacation, taking days off from work, or taking voluntary leave for the duration of the quarantine. And once the puzzle is solved, the most important thing awaits us: what will we do during these 7 days?

At first, not being able to leave the house, staying in to play, or failing to fulfill our obligations may sound fun, but boredom quickly takes over, and measures must be taken to reverse the chaos. So, if we don't intend to reach this point, it might be worth establishing new routines for the benefit of the entire family. Enlisting the children's cooperation in planning new routines will be of great help, as they will feel part of the change, fostering their acceptance and cooperation. Adjusting our needs as parents to the new reality, to the needs of our children, listening to and validating their opinions, and negotiating!

As plans for the new routine we could include:

• Maintain routines and schedules for sleeping and getting up, personal hygiene, and meals (this will allow the day to have a sequence and not allow us to reach the end of the day feeling like we didn't do anything)
• Cooking as a family and following a healthy diet
• we get to the end of the day with the feeling that we did nothing)
• Dressing up for the street (even if we're not going out, dressing up for the street gives us a different mood and a sense of differentiation between day and night)
• Establish learning/school schedules
• Encourage fun and recreational moments with the family, such as doing crafts, dancing, watching a movie with popcorn, etc.
• Exercise at home (obstacle courses around the house, movement games, online dance classes, etc.)
• Share and collaborate on household chores according to the child's age.
• Make time to talk with family and friends (use technology to bring those who are far away closer)
• Allow time for reflection so that each member of the family can express their feelings, something that has happened (good or bad), fears or concerns, but also reflect on the wonderful and positive aspects of this week of 100% togetherness, quality time, enjoying family time, and the opportunity to get to know each other better. Often, children are unable to understand what they feel or put a name to emotions like "anger" or "fear." Reflecting with them, naming and validating their emotions will have positive effects on their mental health.

During this period, there will likely be moments of difficulty and tension, and some days of ease, hence the importance of flexibility. Find alternatives whenever possible and within the rules established by each family unit. Rules help establish order and regulate coexistence in order to avoid conflict.

During this period of confinement, it's also important for us as parents to have some time for ourselves and take care of our mental health. Knowing how to prioritize before stress, fatigue, or monotony overwhelms us. Putting aside our parental identity for a moment, dedicating ourselves to self-care, reading, or meditating can be of great help.

Living with confinement means adapting our daily lives to new situations, new challenges, restructuring routines, managing our own emotions, and supporting those of our children. It's not easy; it's more like a roller coaster ride, with ups and downs throughout the day, experiencing opposing emotions. While we get angry and frustrated because things aren't going as we expected, we can also intensely experience the good things that happen to us, like enjoying a movie together on the couch wrapped in a blanket or sharing endless hugs. Whatever the reality each family finds themselves in and experiences, they will surely all be able to transform their thoughts, emotions, and reflections into something constructive. Supporting and caring for our children emotionally is as, if not more, important than their physical health.